Urban Dictionary for Issue 8
KMP :phrase; Abbreviation for Karma Meets Procrastinator. '''(Often mistaken for '''KettleMeetPot for its unnatural similarity) This phenomenon is common when a user with absolutely no obligation to the fanon portal makes such drastic contributions that official fanon editors all look lame in comparison. As a result, lazy editors are exposed and forced to work again out of guilt. "It's only been six months since I said I'd edit your fanon page. Sheesh!" "Yeah, I shouldn't have asked... Huh? What's this?" "(Sigh) What is it ''now?" "Apparently this guy just swooped through my entire fanon page, fixed my spelling and grammar, and even made me my own category! I feel so special!" "What? Who does that guy think he is? I bet his fanon sucks!" "Actually, he doesn't even write fanon - AND he still helped me! Hmph!" "Oh - er - pshhh, well anyone can fix spelling and grammar, you don't have to make such a big deal. Here, let me see your fanon -" "But he already fixed it -" "LET ME SEE YOUR FANON! I'LL HELP YOU!!!" "Calm down! What's gotten into you?! Hmm wait...looks like we're in a KMP situation, eh?" '' Fanon Fever :noun; A widespread and incurable infection, lethal to anything that has actual importance in life. The symptoms begin as soon as fanon-writing becomes a reason you fall behind on something that should never be fallen behind on...and it only grows worse from there. But of course, you keep writing anyway. "(Yawn) I'm so tired... You were saying, Steve?" "...'Steve?'" "Yeah, something wrong? I'm - OHHH HAHAHA sorry Mr. Rocks! I'm sooo out of it...I was just looking at your Steve Carell icon while you were talking...and I dunno how it somehow got mixed up -" "Okay um, maybe you should rest. What's been keeping you up so late?" "Oh ya knowww, school just really sucks and I didn't sleep again last night, sooo...(trails off)" "Okay...so that means you've just released a 10,000-word chapter of your fanon on zero hours of sleep?" "Yep!" "...Say, did you ever think that you just maybeee have fanon fever -" "WHAT?! How dare you accuse me of such a thing! If you think this has ANYTHING to do with me getting fired or hitting a car the other day or forgetting I'm a student at my own university, or, or - WELL, you're crazy! I thought you were my friend! I hate you! AAAGH!" (Runs off wailing) "...What just happened?" '' '''Romantically Disguised Suicide' :noun; What 70% of "romance" fanons tend to be. It's claimed to be the ultimate love story, but everyone knows that it's only a convenient excuse to make the protagonist attempt (and sometimes succeed at) committing suicide."'And he just couldn't bear the thought of being without her forever. Right then and there, he looked over the edge of the cliff of the shadowy sea, whispered 'I'll see you soon, love,' and took the ultimate leap of faith -'" "BUT SHE'S ALIVE! Why would he do that?!" "'Shhh, he doesn't ''know ''she's alive remember? It's supposed to be like a Romeo-and-Juliet situation -" "But they hardly spent any time together! I wouldn't even say they're in love and he's gonna go kill himself over her already?!" "Well hey, Romeo only knew Juliet for what, a few -" "You're not Shakespeare!!! This is just romantically disguised suicide no matter how you look at it. (Sigh) Can I read one where he stays alive now?" Heartbreak :noun; Something participants in AvatarRokusGhost's fanon trivia contest suffer from when they spend an hour searching for an answer only to find out once they've refreshed the page that someone had already answered the question. "Finally, after reading all 101 chapters of I've found the answer to ARG's irritatingly specific question! Now all I need to do is type it up frantically! Yes… yes… YES!!! I've done it!… … Wha?… … … … … … … … What's this? Ruen's already answered it?! NOOOOO!!!! Even a team of Adele and Taylor Swift couldn't write a song to heal the massive heartbreak I feel right now…" The Rock Li :noun; The maniacal duo known as the White Lotus Sentinel editors. Their combined influence on the newsletter sits somewhere between the rage of political ideals and the obsessive glorification of the Earth Kingdom, particularly the Dai Li. One might get an entirely different impression of the WLS article-management system, when looking behind the scenes...but hey, it works! (Right?) Transcript of an official meeting at Rock Li Headquarters... OR: "We're scheduled to publish tomorrow." Minn: "Oh, yeah! How many columns do we need to add so far?" "Actually, we have zero." "...Really now?" "Yea." "WELL, I should go ask around then! ^^" (Completely calm about having no articles) "Yeah, might be a good idea." (On the day of publishing) "So these people have sent in their columns!" "Cool, I'll just see if the other staff wants to write anything then. Maybe we'll actually have something to publish. (Pause) DARNIT! My newest political YouTube video has less views than the last!" "That sucks! But on that note, you ever updating Political Animals again?" "Ah, if only I could find time..." "(Sigh) Don't we all? But you seriously need to start incorporating the Dai Li into there. It's in Ba Sing Se, for crying out loud! D8<" "We'll see...and how about that offer to join Conservative Wiki, eh? We have cake! You KNOW you want to..." (And the article magically gets published shortly after)